Today I took an early morning walk around Lake Merritt here in Oakland. It was a beautiful Father’s Day morning. My thoughts have been filled with my children. All are grown now and just beginning their early young adulthood.
Being a divorced dad, I was in their home full time when they were very young. Since then I have lived a couple of states away and so my time with them has only been a few times a year. We have spent many hours over the phone, but I regret the loss of physical time with them during those years.
We have somehow made it through with our relationships still intact. My son and I had the hardest struggle but that has improved. I saw all of them a couple of weeks ago at my youngest daughter’s graduation and it was one of my best memories with them.
This Father’s Day brings me a sense of renewal with my children and new era for us. It is one in which promises a deepening relationship with each of them. My heart is full of love for each of them. I want to be supportive of their goals and only wish them much happiness in their lives. I am here for them.
During this morning walk, I also thought of my father who passed away when I was 23 years old. Living in my memories of him made him real again to me. I could almost smell that Old Spice cologne that all men of his generation would wear back then.
He would love all the technology today, mainly, because it would give him instant access to sports. Today is Sunday, so I can see him in front of the TV watching some game giving his opinion on the plays like the expert he thought he was on every sport. I miss him on days like this day. I miss him in my life.
Sons miss their dads. There is something about having your father around even when you are way into adulthood yourself. It maybe is the wisdom that he brings or just the understanding that he knows what it feels like…
So my walk around the lake on this Father’s Day made me realize that fatherhood is perhaps the most important thing that a man can do in his life.