Receiving Love

Last night I went to a workshop conducted by one of my dear friends, Soniyah Singh, of Finding Bliss ( www.  She is a matchmaker for gay men.  I actually attended more out of obligation to her as a friend and not really with the intent of getting anything out of it. I was not going with a listening heart to say the least. I went to support her with my physical presence but not with my open heart .

I am not sure if cynical is the word I want to use, but lately, I have not had the best of luck with having a steady dating relationship.  I was just not in the mood in a word.   However, there were familiar faces so that gave me some strength.

It was the third workshop in the series and it was the only one I attended. It focused on maintaining relationships.  Soniyah took us through exercises like recognizing our love language.  This means recognizing how we perceive receiving love and how others do it too. Sometimes how we do it does not mean our partner uses those same things. For example, for some people they perceive love when they get a lot of  affection and touch from others.  Others prefer praise and verbal affirmation.  Others need more quality time. Others prefer gifts as an indication of love.

The majority of break ups statistically happen because couples slowly stop appreciating each other and not showing that appreciation for each other regularly.  That is when emotional distance comes in and couples drift.

There was discussion on how to handle conflict, spend time together, and other topics that were really thought provoking. Even though the topics were centered on maintaining relationships, the theme of living in your truth resonated with me.

I believe that if one is searching for a partner , boyfriend or spouse, it is integral that you stay true to who you are yourself. Sure you may have to compromise some of the little things in order for the two of you to blend into a relationship where there is a union, but you do not lose yourself in it.

There are certain things that are very important to who I am and what makes me who I am.  I think that we have to come into a potential relationship with our eyes wide open following our already open heart,  really making sure that the relationship simply enhances who we are or brings out the best in us.  We also have this love for the other person and our desire is to help them in their path to happiness.  It is a journey you go on together.

So I left the workshop, thinking I am glad Soniyah forced me to come.  It gave me some answers I needed.

Thank goodness for my DVR, though. I was able to record my favorite TV shows and still watch them  😛

Oh Amore!

6 thoughts on “Receiving Love

  1. Very interesting… I’m in a 10+ year relationship and I’m pretty sure it’s for life. I used to be fiercely independent, which actually meant a bit selfish… In the end if you can balance honesty, respect and empathy, it’s not too hard to make things work.

  2. JP, wow I’m glad you came too and got some thoughts stirring up in your big beautiful heart! Thank you for sharing them.

    Sending you gratitude and love!

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