I will have special people around me this Christmas, so it will not be a sad time.  However,  I will not be spending any time with family.  Most of it is due to economics.  Sadly, the recession takes its toll on travel opportunities when relatives live as far off as Guam.

Thankfully, modern communications has made it possible to keep in contact and be almost face to face on a live connection.  Yet, there is a melancholy of sorts in my heart.  The true meaning of this season to me as always had at its core , my family.  It has been filled with the presence of my children, my mother and my siblings and other extended family.  There is a wistfulness of heart and soul as the  season reaches a head this weekend.

I am not sure if it really homesickness I am feeling but it more family yearning.  I feel love from others this holiday and my time has been filled with great events and some wonderful people, like I mentioned previously. However, my heart draws me to family where warmth and safety exists for my soul. There is refuge with them.

I find tears welling up when I hear familiar Christmas tunes and also as I see the festive decorations light up windows and neighborhoods. They trigger memories of my family.

I am especially mindful of my children.  It is hard to even type my feelings without them without pausing because the fullness of my heart for all four of them simply flows heavily into my fingers. I am overcome with love for my babies who are all grown now but forever remain my little ones.

I know that love knows no distance, but the heart feels it.

Christmas without family is not the same. However, it still can be one of joy, knowing that family is still there and that the spirit of Christmas can extend to every day of the year.

Merry Christmas, family.   I miss and love you.

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